Imagine that you are standing under a
waterfall. The water pounds down on your head and shoulders and pins your feet
to the ground. The steady rush of water feels good. At times, it feels ecstatic.
But often
the force of the water is too much. It hurts. You want it to stop. You tilt
your body slightly, hoping to find a gap in the sheets of water cascading down
on you. You do, and for a moment the pain lessens. But then the full force of
the water finds you again. The pain is intense. You feel trapped.
Now
imagine that one day, for no reason you can think of, you step back from the
waterfall. You had no idea there was a space behind you the whole time, a
cavern cut into the rock that easily accommodates your frame. The relief you
feel is immense. Your body feels light. You witness the water pouring down
inches from your nose. The inches seem like miles. Now the water begins to flow
from you. Tears of joy are streaming down your cheeks. You have stepped away
from the steady rush of water, from the endless cycle of pleasure and pain
you¡¯d been experiencing for as long as you can remember.
We spend our lives immersed in a flood
of thoughts, unaware that another dimension of consciousness is available to
us. It is a dimension in which we come to know ourselves as something other
than thinkers. By taking a step back, we become the witness of our thoughts. Of
the millions of steps we¡¯ve taken in our lives, this subtle but radical step
may be the most important because it leads to a profound sense of peace.
We cannot
think our way into this witnessing dimension. It only emerges when
thought subsides, hopping like a bunny from the bushes when the coast is
clear. The thoughts that pleaded for our attention gradually recede in
the presence of our steady witnessing gaze. In this transformative moment we
have stepped back from the flow of thought into the serene space of our
awareness.
This
space is not as mystical as it might seem. Haven¡¯t we all experienced moments
when we¡¯ve witnessed the thoughts flowing through our minds without getting
dragged into their current?
Have you
ever quarreled with someone and refrained from expressing a hurtful thought
that surfaced in your mind? How were you able to perceive that thought? Was it
illuminated by the light of your awareness?
Have you ever sat on an airplane, minutes before takeoff, fearing that it was
going to crash and that you¡¯d never see your loved ones again? What stopped you
from unbuckling your seatbelt and bolting for the door? Was it because you were
you aware, if only vaguely, that the thoughts parading through your mind were a
bit farfetched?
We experience these brief but revealing glimpses of our witnessing capacity
without recognizing their value. We move past them inattentively, the way
we might a Rembrandt at a yard sale. But to spend one clear-eyed moment
in this space is to observe that the territory of thought is limited, that it
is easily contained within the greater space of our awareness. This flash of
insight will awaken us to a new identity. By observing thought, we are
born as its witness.
If we wish to dwell rather than dart in and out of in this vibrant dimension,
we must do more than simply change the way we think; we must change our
relationship with thought. We must become its ever-present witness to
avoid being its ever-suffering accomplice. Helpful one moment and devious
the next, thought is like a petulant child requiring our constant attention.
As thought¡¯s witness, we are its master. We can summon it if we wish to
bake a cake or split an atom, and dismiss it when it shows up uninvited. But
for this cozy relationship with thought to last, we must keep it permanently in
our sights. This will take every ounce of energy we have, and at first
even that won¡¯t be enough. We have been thought¡¯s servant for so long
that we¡¯ll continue to obey it by sheer habit.
But in time our tolerance for suffering at the hands of thought will lessen.
The pleasure will no longer seem worth the pain. And those isolated
moments when we glimpse the chains and pulleys driving our thought process will
begin to connect like stars in a constellation. As we step further and
further back from the realm of thought, we will see it in its entirety and know
that we exist beyond its borders.
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